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Stimulus package, how you spendin yours?

Gingerbeard said:
Spidermite I gave you a like and would give your further PRIMO props, word!

You have a race car you take out to race. I'm assuming on a straight track or are a silly circle driver. Not a street racer or someone who challenges me in my '78 Ford Fiesta. What kind of small penis is that shit, anyway. I'm already on the rocks with my lady.

My point is, a car that pegs out at 140mph, say, has about 65mph that can't legally be used. My '04 Rubicon did that, supposedly. Scared the hell out of me at 75. Anything over that and my pucker factor made my seatbelt superfluous. People who own serious sports cars in the US are idiots. Do you suppose anyone ever tried to carjack the Duke boys? What with the doors being welded shut? And who'd be stupid enough to try to carjack two moonshiners who shoot TNT dipped arrows at high hill hillbilly cops and mayor?

Whatever speed the Rubicon went, I'd be happy if it did 75 at hammer down. So I can get off the streets and use it for it's nature destroying abilities, off road. Drive through beautiful flower fields to pluck a bunch for the ride home. Create holes for mud holes in the middle of trails to hit, next time it rained. Chase mountain goats and ram into through brush to freak out the birds. There are some cars that have to be used for what they were built for. It's another zombie apocalypse angle for me. The bastards will be all in the neighborhoods while I'm off in my super secret emergency bunker. I can survive for 72 years in that thing. You could have a hundred zombies piss on my bunker and I wouldn't even know The apocalypse will be over way before that. Milla Jovovich and the Umbrella Corporation will have everything under control by then.

So, thank you, my responsible friend for doing the right thing.
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Perhaps you would reconsider. Especially if you decide to bug out to your super secret bunker. $1200 smackaroons should purchase a sizeable amount of 4k Blu-Ray ugly hooker Krispy Kreme porn. Another angle - apply Krispy Kreme to package and call fido over...otherwise, you might be bored to tears while the zombies relieve themselves overhead.
 
The DVD player on my laptop can't read DVD's for some reason. No Blu-Ray, either. That's what internet porn is all about. Imagine playing porn on a 10' wide screen. Not that I have such a screen. More than life size bazingos. And it's free. Cures boredom lickity spit. Work up a relationship with an online live-feed honey. Stripping for cancer treatment money for their sweet grandmothers. I loved my grandma.
 
I have a 2x3x4.5 that splits into a 2x2 and a 2x1. Sprouting on the small side. Veg in the large.
 
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As soon as a zombie start's peeing on my bunker, a little flame throwing rat comes out and set's the pee on fire. Nothing can clear a topside full of urinating zombies than the smell of piss on fire. Don't worry. The rat is completely safe in a Nomex suit.
 
It's all fun and games, until the ugly hooker starts hacking 'rona loogies on the screen and then the servers go down. I mean literally, not porn-wise like you might perceive. And BEHOLD! We have arrived at the solution - You need a NEW LAPTOP!
 
I feel your trying to say something. But for the life of me I'm just not getting it. Maybe it's all th high octane gas I use to destroy the environment or all the lead rounds I throw down range to be ready for anything. Maybe it's the plastic I'm burning to heat the house. Oh well who knows.
 
You had me cracking up about the Dukes!
It’s just a fun thing we like doing in the states. It’s 1/8th and 1/4mi racing that ppl like us like doing. I really got into rock crawling after the ex made me quit racing 1/4. We do it because it’s a mix of being adrenaline junkies and dealing with high stress lives and need outlets for it. Him and I are both ready for the zombie apocalypse on our farms. Miao has gone a bit downhill over the years, so I’m gonna have to go for Jennifer Aniston. 😂😏. I take it you’re in the UK eh?
 
I did love the Duke Boys comment. And you can ask D.A.A.S.69 all of us southerners can shoot exploding arrows. Hell we put explosives in the targets we shoot. One hell of a good time.
 
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Well Spidermite I'm sure you know the feeling,some of us just like having the bad assest iron on the block. My wife told me "we have a shitty looking driveway, you should do something about it" I said OK! now it looks better. And 500 hp. is just fun.
 
When I was a kid in Dallas we could get fireworks. I would save some to make my own pyrotechnic somethings with the powders and balls. I never got the bang back in my pyros. Mostly fizzle and sparks like anime space missiles.

Blew up a camp fire with a half full bottle of beer with the cap mostly on. We were drunk and transfixed on the fire. All of a sudden, bulammo went the bottle. There was a scuttle between my buddy and I to put out several small fires. The next morning, my days old Anthrax concert t-shirt was ruined. And other shit I still don't care about.
 
Thanks, Spidermite. Part of me thought Anthrax was a joke band. The music was great but the lyrics sounded like nursery rhymes. Same-same with Death Angel, Gwar, SOD, and MOD. Really, just silly. Not that Phish's 'Reba' winds any poetry awards.
 
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