Random Funnies

[iwanttoknow]

Just something I saw on MeWe that made me laugh. Heck, everything is better deep fried.

Now I know what to do with the leaves that are trimmed!

[MeEasy]

[JohnEmad]

[Puglover1]

[Gingerbeard]

Pulled this blurb from a BBC story about the blizzard about to hit the east coast. If you're over there, see if you can hitch a ride with Farmbuck to the Yuc. Out there, you know to watch out for coconuts.
"Florida is also expected to see some of its coldest temperatures in years, leading to iguanas - a cold-blooded lizard species - to become immobilised and fall out of trees."

[Ckbrew]

Waiting out the blizzard in new england. Idk what people r concerned about. 35 - 30 years ago we had snow like this all the time. I can remember getting up at 5 am to plow, drive to work in it, work for 12 hours, drive home in it, have to walk up the driveway in snow shoes to get to the house, get the truck and plow again, go get car, finally get home by 11 pm. Sleep, repeat. Can't tell you how over it I am. Not dong that anymore.

[Farmbuck]

A few weeks ago we had in one day 18 inches of snow follow a day or two by 14 inches. Not bad for a week hey lolll Now we might break a record for the coldest and longest month of January. Try -14F for a few nites lolll

[Puglover1]

Ckbrew I remember in the late 70's we had a few rough winters here, record snowfall amounts for the season. My little town and Chicago both had snow removal scandals. My dad and a fellow bookie had to plead the 5th in front of a grand jury because the City Clerk ratted out the mayor for demanding hush money. (My grandfather worked for Capone during Prohibition, I'm a generational outlaw.) But we didn't have such strong winds all the time back then when it snowed. I think the ice event on I-95 plus losing power is what is freaking people out more these days. Texans had to burn their furniture for heat last year.

[Gingerbeard]

It's happening.

[Going2fast]

Holy hell I was down there fishing in January back in the early 2000s and when kept hearing something fall out of the trees on the shore. Turns out it was iguanas. It was like 40 degrees. Never would have believed it until I saw a 4 footer do a Deadman from 12 feet up.

[Going2fast]

[Gingerbeard]

Showed the welding picture to a buddy of mine who is in welding school. Said it's one of the first things they did when learning to weld aluminum.
Have him email back a picture of welding the thin metal.
You left personal information in the picture.

[Going2fast]

Dude has no chin or neck.

[Guest]

Are people who swear more intelligent?
Swearing is a sign of intelligence, helps manage pain and more...
Well-educated people with plenty of words at their disposal, a 2015 study found,
were better at coming up with curse words than those who were less verbally fluent.

[Puglover1]

I'd like 10 CC's, stat. Ma head hurts. Yesterday I messed up my arm/shoulder pulling a leash out of Crazy pug's mouth before Grumpy got angrier, I broke up a tussle with my feet last weekend. Took them for nail buzzing, went for an x-ray then got some stuff at the store bc I can't reach the top pantry shelves. One block from home two little girls were standing by the street, one threw an ice ball the size of a baseball at my car. There's a dent.

[Gingerbeard]

A rabbi and a priest are having lunch.
The rabbi says, "My god is better than your god."
So the priest says, "No way!"
The rabbi throws his hands in the air with praise.
He bellow, "Yahweh."

[Gingerbeard]

Why does this presidential SUV have luggage racks on top?

[Puglover1]

why does it look duct taped between the windows?

[Gingerbeard]

That's armor PL.

[Puglover1]

Something to hold onto on the fly

[Puglover1]

[Puglover1]

Truth. I went as a blue nun for Halloween one year.