Somewhat wasteful of your gardening talents by not enjoying the fruits of your labors. You might try avoiding the psychoactive strains, and going for the Indica strains. Your mind might very well be like mine that is stimulated into over activity inducing far too much critical self analysis. Don't ponder the big questions, but relax and enjoy the sedation of a couch lock. Aurora Indica is a favorite of my wife's. https://www.nirvanashop.com/marijuana-seeds/819-aurora-indica-feminized.html