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**BU2B** · 01-18-2023, 07:00 AM

Sigh-ence made Simple

**SoOrbudgal** · 01-18-2023, 10:53 AM

**BU2B** · 01-18-2023, 03:40 PM

Amazing Simple Home Remedies
•If you are choking on an ice cube, simply pour a cup of boiling water down your throat. PRESTO! The blockage will instantly remove itself.
•Avoid cutting yourself when slicing vegetables by getting someone else to hold the vegetables while you chop.
*Avoid arguments about the toilet seat...Use the sink.
*For high blood pressure sufferers~~ Simply cut yourself and bleed a few minutes., thus reducing the pressure on your veins. REMEMBER TO USE A TIMER.
•A mouse trap placed on top of your alarm clock will prevent you from rolling over and going back to sleep after you hit the snooze button.
*If you have a bad cough, take a large dose of laxatives. Then you will be afraid to cough at all.
*You only need 2 tools in life..
..WD-40 and duct tape. If it doesn't move and should, use WD-40....If it moves and shouldn't, use the tape.
•Remember- Everyone seems normal until you get to know them.
•If you can't fix it with a hammer, you've got an electrical problem.

AND A DAILY THOUGHT:
SOME PEOPLE ARE LIKE SLINKIES....NOT REALLY GOOD FOR ANYTHING, BUT THEY BRING A SMILE TO YOUR FACE WHEN PUSHED DOWN THE STAIRS.

**PRIMO** · 01-18-2023, 04:50 PM

I am 71 years old and I have so many unanswered questions!!!! I still haven't found out who let the Dogs Out...where's the beef...how to get to Sesame Street... why Dora doesn't just use Google Maps...Why do all flavors of fruit loops taste exactly the same, or how many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop......why eggs are packaged in a flimsy paper carton, but batteries are secured in plastic that's tough as nails, yet light bulbs too are in a flimsy carton... Ever buy scissors? You need scissors to cut into the packaging of scissors... i still don't understand why there is Braille on drive up ATM's or why "abbreviated" is such a long word; or why is there a D in 'fridge' but not in refrigerator... why lemon juice is made with artificial flavor yet dish-washing liquid is made with real lemons... why they sterilize the needle for lethal injections... and, why do you have to "put your two cents in" but it's only a "penny for your thoughts" where's that extra penny going... why do The Alphabet Song and Twinkle Twinkle Little Star have the same tune... why did you just try to sing those two previous songs... and just what is Victoria's secret? ....and what would you do for a Klondike bar and you know as soon as you bite into it it falls apart...and Why do we drive on Parkways and park on Driveways? do you really think I am this witty?? ... I actually got this from a friend, who stole it from her brother's girlfriend's, uncle's cousin's, baby momma's doctor who lived next door to an old class mate's mail man...Now it is your turn to take it from me...Peace!!
Copy and Paste, change the age, and enjoy your day!

**Ckbrew** · 01-19-2023, 08:55 PM

10 characters

**alltatup** · 01-22-2023, 07:36 AM

PRIMO I have the answers for you:

1. Snoop Dog
2. In the fridge
3. Take a right on Tahini Blvd
4. She doesn't have a computer
5. Only the toxic dye knows
6. 676
7. So you buy more when they break
8. So the acid can melt through the plastic
9. So you can get as many people as you need to screw them in
10. Yes, I have bought scissors, but I stole the one I used to cut them open.
11. Braille is for automatic car drivers
12. Because it has 2 bs and 2 es, plus all the other letters.
13. The d is in there to keep it standing up.
14. Capitalism
15. Also prevents Hepatitis B
16. Inflation
17. Bach wrote them that way
18. a secret box
19. Not a whole helluva lot
20. Does your nose run and your feet smell? You, too, are built backwards.
21. Almost as witty as me